wedding jitters

Just a little sneak preview of the engagement pictures we took this weekend, thanks so my sister, the maid of honor.

Random but true, I have had some strange day dreams, and fears about our upcoming wedding. Don't get me wrong, I have never been happier, but it can be a little nerve racking. I guess B has gone through something similar, {just another thing we have in common....worry}. He had a dream about getting stuck in the bathroom while our wedding service was supposed to start. Not exactly earth shattering, but not the best way to awake from sleep.

My fears have been a little more substantial: like what if it rains....what if a DIY project that I spent hours on suddenly went wrong and I have to pitch a projects that I poured dozens of hours that into....what if one of the bridesmaids suddenly gets sick....what if there's a snow storm!! Yikes! My head just starts spinning when I think about all the things that could go wrong.

I'm sure there isn't anyone in their right mind that couldn't get stressed out from a little worry on their wedding day. But instead of worrying about what could happen, I have decided to put my effort into thinking about what will happen:

#1 I am blessed enough to marry and be bonded to the love of my life

#2 B and I get to declare our love for each other in front of our friends and family

#3 We get to have an amazing party {lasting days before and after} to celebrate our marriage

#4 Even if something goes wrong, the Lord has a reason for it

#5 After we get married we won't have to travel every weekend to spend time with each other

#6 We will be going on a honeymoon to relax after our action packed few months

#7 We get to decorate our very own apartment and make a new life together

#8 Our family member numbers will double in size as we join each others

#9 We will have fabulous photos and memories that will last a life time

#10 The Lord has blessed us with spending the rest of our lives as best friends

our adventurous trip

Lately our engagement has seemed to take the spot light, and the rest of our trip to California hasn't been touched on. I am at to blame, but can you blame me for wanting to plan a wedding?

I did take quite a few pictures of the always wonderful bay area that was {and still is} my home sweet home. When we started off the trip, I thought it would be a little overwhelming for my {at the time} boyfriend, but little did I know that he would soon be overwhelming me {in good way of course}! From day 1 he has never ceased to surprise me with his quest for adventure and this trip was no different. We saw everything we could fit into a 5 1/2 day trip.

We explored the vividly colored streets of San Francisco and marveled at the view of the city. We soaked up the warm weather in the silicon valley.

We dipped our very sun deprived feet into the bitter cold ocean waves. I showed B my old house where I spend the first 12 years of my life, with a wild imagination lighting up my vivid walls.

We wondered at the Stanford chapel {where much to my dismay, no pictures were aloud to be taken}.

I introduced B to more people then I can count {well that may be an exaggeration, but it was quite a few} and not only as my boyfriend, but now as my fiance.

We tasted the difference between Mid-west seafood and West-coast seafood. We were awestruck by the vast amount of expensive boats in the San Francisco marina.

We spent the day in Monterey with some of my closest friends, and saw the wonders stretch out before us.

We walked the street near Pier 39 and saw the the elephant seals basking in the sun.

Even two weeks later, I can still imagine the ocean mist on my face from the tremendous waves crashing just feet away from our waiting toes.

engagement: how it went about

I am still in disbelief most days, until I hear phrases like "I'm the mother of the bride" {and realize that my mom is talking about me} or someone grabs my left hand to see the sparkly new ring that sits upon my fourth finger. All of these feelings and surreal moments started on the wonderful day of Febuary 9th.

I awoke that morning to a pitch dark room, because seeing as though I had not adapted to the time change, it was about 5 am and I was wide awake. I was wide awake and anxious to start the 1st full day of our vacation, in San Francisco. With my grandparents and 3rd grandma, e played tourist to almost every sight I was hoping for and showed Brian many of the wonders of San Francisco.

We started out and the twin peaks drove through Chinatown. We had clam chowder in a sour dough bread bowl and rode a cable car. We drove down the twisty street of Lumbard and walked hand in hand down fisherman's warf. We strolled up and down Pier 39 and giggled and the sea lions basking in the sun. And last but not least we went to my favorite: the Golden Gate Bridge.

This may be very iconic and touristy, but not where we go. It was here that I instantly was distracted with clicking the buttons of my camera to capture these perfect moments that the time of day was giving us.

Brian and I had taken a walk after we marveled at the brave surfers {in wet suits of course} who were braving the rocky shore to catch a good wave and coast into the shore. It was the perfect moment: Brian had his arms wrapped around me and we stared up at the wonder that the Golden Gate Bridge left behind in our eyes. I truly didn't believe that it could get any better...until Brian turned this moment into one that I would never forget as long as I lived.

It was there {with tears in our eyes} that he asked me to marry him, and it was there that I {after about 30 seconds of "oh my goodness" and "I can't believe this is really happening"} said yes as he slipped an amazingly sparkly ring onto my finger. I was in shock and truly didn't believe that he had pulled off keeping a secret like this from me for a few weeks.

The center stone on our engagement ring is a family diamond, from my great-grandmother. Even though I never got to meet her, it feels even more special to know that I am wearing a family heirloom that will be passed onto my grand children some day.

I couldn't have imagined a more special place, a more amazing ring, or a more spectacular man to spend forever with.

P.S. We celebrated this exciting occasion in a truly 'Ryan family' way: we went to Ghirardelli Square and had the most amazing Sundays for dinner!!

from girlfriend to fiance

It's official, it is possible to be happier then I ever imagined.

My best friend & the love of my life made me the happiest girl with just a simple question and some major bling, symbolizing our love. The question that I have dreamed of hearing ever since I started planning fake weddings as a girl, yes I was one of those girls.

In the past 8 months {to the day} I went from being a girlfriend, to a best friend, to a fiance and future wife to the most amazing man I have ever known.

Life really doesn't get any better then this!!

this week's to-do list

- attend to my growing pile of laundry

- call a few of my fabulous girlfriends whom I miss so dearly

- make the final plans & begin a packing list for my upcoming trip

- dig my summer clothes out of storage and sort through the colorful clothing in preparation for next week

- paint my nails a fabulous shade of baby pink
- get a few blog posts ready for my week of absence
- clean & organize my room/office/bathroom

- clean my car, from the messy/disorganized inside to the salty/dirt crusted outside

- update my hair-do with a some fresh highlights

- prep charts {at work} for next week, so it will be a smooth transition for the CMA taking over in my absence

- get started on the ever-so-fun task of taxes

- spend time with a few friends, before I become incommunicado for a week

- have a quick chat with all the amazing people we will be staying with in California

- eat healthy and stay active to help with stress

- run a few errands to target, walgreens
- catch up on a few of my tv shows that I am so far behind with

- place a few online orders that I have been meaning to accomplish for a few week
 - fit in a few plasma appointments

- enjoy this amazing 'winter' weather that we have been blessed with